Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
The Worst of the Decade
#36
oh man, HOLMES AND WATSON. I heard it was terrible, but I caught 5 minutes or so the other day while flipping around on Starz just to verify how bad it is. SHOAH is funnier.
Reply
#37
Bright needs to be mentioned.
Reply
#38
(11-07-2019, 12:50 PM)Fat Elvis Wrote:
(11-07-2019, 12:28 PM)atomtastic Wrote: My hot take list:

Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping

I never got around to that one, but it seems to have a MACGRUBER-like cult.

The Lonely Island comedic sensibility is definitely an acquired taste.

Curious, did you dig HOT ROD? I'm a huge fan!
It's kinda everything I hate about modern comedy. They don't let the joke play, someone always has to point out how ridiculous everything is or they just repeat it into the ground. Everything follows this format:

Guy 1: does / says crazy thing.
Guy 2: Did you just do / say a crazy thing?
Guy 1: Um, no.
Guy 2: I'm pretty sure you did.
Guy 1: I definitely didn't.
Guy 2: You definitely did.
Guy 1: Why would I do / say this crazy thing?
Guy 2: I don't know, it's crazy!

I remember thinking Hot Rod was ok, though.

But I guess this is where I show my bad taste because I thought Holmes and Watson was just some nice, idiotic fun on par with lesser Mel Brooks. A Soulcycle class on Penny Farthings? That shit is funny!
Reply
#39
POPSTAR justified itself with the Will Arnett bits.

The comedy that everyone hated but was actually funny was DIRTY GRANDPA.
Reply
#40
(11-07-2019, 10:22 AM)Munson Wrote: Independence Day 2 was awful. Zero redeeming features.

I think this is true only if you actually expected it to be 'good'.

I watched it as a modern day equivalent of a cheesy 50's giant monster movie and I love me some DeadlyMantis/EarthVsFlyingSaucers/AmazingColossalMan destruction.

This also applies to those Pacific Rim films.
I used to be with "it", but then they changed what "it" was. Now, what I'm with isn't "it", and what's "it" seems weird and scary to me.   -Grandpa Simpson
Reply
#41
SUCKER PUNCH is great.

Nobody has said THE DANISH GIRL, so I'm going to say THE DANISH GIRL.
home taping is killing music
Reply
#42
Sucker Punch is great? SUCKER PUNCH IS GREAT?!?!?!

Goddamnit, Boone, why do you make these terrible, nonfactual statements?
If you're happy, you're not paying attention.

Originally Posted by JacknifeJohnny: 
Glad that you guys worked that out amongst yourselves.

Reply
#43
(11-07-2019, 02:02 PM)Alt-molt Wrote: POPSTAR justified itself with the Will Arnett bits.

The comedy that everyone hated but was actually funny was DIRTY GRANDPA.
I love the Lonely Island movies AND Dirty Grandpa! When it comes to the "everything wrong about modern comedy" conversation, my vote would go toward THIS IS 40, a two and a half hour movie about two sour rich people who seem to detest each other in between delivering lots of improvised jib-jab. Apatow's nadir.

But holy hell YOGA HOSERS! I told this story before I think, but I remember a friend of my wife staying at our house, and she had worked on that movie, but hadn't seen it, so we rented it on Amazon. As the credits rolled, she turned to us and apologized.
I was in a horror-comedy called BLACK HOLLER. It's now on Prime Video. Check it out!
Reply
#44
(11-07-2019, 11:44 AM)huntertarantino Wrote: The Counselor

I know we've had some back and forths on this one but I find it very engrossing. It's a very mean movie but I can't get enough of the looney dialog on display.

Cameron Diaz just goes for it. Unflinching work from her.
Reply
#45
FANTASTIC FOUR 2.0, GROWN UPS 2 and APOLLO 18 jump to mind immediately.
Reply
#46
(11-07-2019, 02:07 PM)Neil Spurn Wrote: Sucker Punch is great?  SUCKER PUNCH IS GREAT?!?!?!

Goddamnit, Boone, why do you make these terrible, nonfactual statements?

It might just be a matter of perspective. I was resistant to watching it for a really long time, but my wife is a big fan. She explained it as "the kind of movie I would have written when I was a 16 year old girl," and that's given me an appreciative take on it. It reminds me a lot in spots of STREETS OF FIRE (though of course I think STREETS is superior).

Agree that MAN OF STEEL is poop, though.

Also, it gave us this: 



home taping is killing music
Reply
#47
I view Snyder the same way atomtastic views Edgar Wright: A singular visual stylist whose storytelling is very, very bad.
I was in a horror-comedy called BLACK HOLLER. It's now on Prime Video. Check it out!
Reply
#48
(11-07-2019, 02:08 PM)Mangy Wrote:
(11-07-2019, 02:02 PM)Alt-molt Wrote: POPSTAR justified itself with the Will Arnett bits.

The comedy that everyone hated but was actually funny was DIRTY GRANDPA.
I love the Lonely Island movies AND Dirty Grandpa! When it comes to the "everything wrong about modern comedy" conversation, my vote would go toward THIS IS 40, a two and a half hour movie about two sour rich people who seem to detest each other in between delivering lots of improvised jib-jab. Apatow's nadir.

The usual knock on Apatow is his movies are good but are 30 minutes longer than they need to be. THIS IS 40 was insufferable from start to finish.

I don't know if my jaw hit the floor quicker during a film this decade than in DIRTY GRANDPA when Efron walks in on Bobby D. jacking it.
Reply
#49
I just realized I mixed up DIRTY GRANDPA with BAD GRANDPA. D'oh!
I was in a horror-comedy called BLACK HOLLER. It's now on Prime Video. Check it out!
Reply
#50
Taking things down a less (attempted) prestigious and respectable avenue than THE SNOWMAN, I also found this year's THE CURSE OF LA LLORONA and THE HAUNTING OF SHARON TATE to be, essentially, unwatchable.

The former because of its laziness, and the latter because of its extreme and insulting bad taste.
If we can dream it, then we can do it.
Reply
#51
I'll never pass up an opportunity to kick Star Trek Into Darkness in the groin.  What a toxic dudebro of a movie.  It's bad enough on its own merits, but slapping the Star Trek name on it makes the pain worse.  I went to see it only because my workplace was closed due to a stabbing incident between two kitchen staff members.  Around the time Kirk was trying and failing to knock out an individual who had surrendered, I wanted to switch places with the stabbing victim.
Reply
#52
I maintain that INTO DARKNESS is a terrible STAR TREK movie... but an okay space adventure if you dropped the connection.
If we can dream it, then we can do it.
Reply
#53
Even divorced from the STAR TREK moniker, it's an incredibly stupid stupid stupid movie. The acting is good, the effects are good, and some of the action sequences are great, but holy shit is that script a slap in the face.
Reply
#54
Beyond is still worse!
Reply
#55
Oh SHIT did I ever forget Red State. I haven't touched a Kevin Smith movie since then and I'm doubting I'll ever bother. Whatever half-baked social commentary he tries to make - and solid work from Michael Parks and John Goodman - is bogged down by a semi-serious attempt to launder the usual Smith dialogue and one of my least favorite gimmicks in movies, which has hurt my enjoyment of everything from Birdman to Sucker Punch: talking down to the audience about a message and denying catharsis. Smith is almost on a level of Springsteen in terms of my home turf. I don't have much of an issue with his movies. Hell, I saw part of Cop Out on HBO this year again and while listless, you can do far worse.

Between Red State and that recent thing where he claimed Scorsese didn't grow up with Spielberg and Lucas like he did (SPOILER: THEY WERE FRIENDS IN THE 70's!), I feel like I have to apologize.

(11-07-2019, 12:50 PM)splatoon Wrote:
(11-07-2019, 11:44 AM)huntertarantino Wrote: Sucker Punch has it all: a neutered PG-13 rating, terrible action sequences, misogyny at the expense of self-indulgence. Rob Zombie's Halloween is the only other movie in recent memory where the ride home from the theater with a friend was stone cold silent on my end.

But it might not be the worst of them all because Kick-Ass 2 exists. Almost walked out midway through because they played rape for comedy... and I own Death Wish II on Blu-ray. I feel like that one isn't hated enough either.

Couple of great picks here. I don't know where I'd rank Sucker Punch vs. BvS (I never re-watched the former for obvious reasons), but as of now both are definitely on the personal top ten. Kick-Ass 2 absolutely belongs on that list as well, I think I actually said this at the time but the worst thing you can say about it is that it's exactly what you'd expect a Mark Millar adaptation to be. What a waste. A terrible movie is always going to be...well, terrible, but there's something extra painful about a horrendous follow-up to a really good flick. Setting aside obvious cash grabs it really is one of the worst sequels ever. 

(11-07-2019, 11:44 AM)huntertarantino Wrote: The Art of Self-Defense

Damn, got this on the backlog. Still curious!

Also, Lockout as one of the worst of the decade? I'd argue that Pearce's performance alone almost makes it decent. Well, watchable. OK, the movie sucks but man did I like that performance a whole lot.

I also think that if this was just a "movies I really don't like" list stuff like STiD/Rogue One/The Last Jedi would definitely make the cut, but I don't think I could genuinely call them the worst of the decade. Well, maybe Star Trek. Again, long ass time, but it didn't produce the near primal "man, fuck that movie" reaction of a Kick-Ass 2.

I was one foot out the door during Kick-Ass 2 as I said over that horrific rape scene. If they'd gone as far as killing Jim Carrey's dog, it would've been the first movie I ever walked out on for moral grounds.

The cheapness and PG-13 rating make Lockout near-insufferable for me. Pearce's character got stuck in a bad movie.

The Art of Self-Defense is like an R-rated Napoleon Dynamite.

(11-07-2019, 02:02 PM)Alt-molt Wrote: POPSTAR justified itself with the Will Arnett bits.

Arnett understands Harvey Levin better than the man himself.

I think the movie is hilarious, but nothing in that movie makes me laugh harder than Bill Hader's character going out of his way to explain that Jan de Bont was the cinematographer of Flatliners. Exactly my type of humor.

(11-07-2019, 02:09 PM)Alt-molt Wrote:
(11-07-2019, 11:44 AM)huntertarantino Wrote: The Counselor

I know we've had some back and forths on this one but I find it very engrossing. It's a very mean movie but I can't get enough of the looney dialog on display.

Cameron Diaz just goes for it. Unflinching work from her.

Diaz is miscast for the ages and it's so, so, so meandering. But as the resident Domino apologist, I'd probably like it if Tony lived to direct it.
"PREDATOR 2 feels like it was penned by convicts as part of a correctional facility's creative writing program, and that's what I love about it." - Moltisanti
Reply
#56
(11-07-2019, 03:13 PM)atomtastic Wrote: Beyond is still worse!

I respectfully disagree with you here.  I thought BEYOND was delightful.
Reply
#57
This thread is PTSD triggering.

Reply
#58
BIRDMAAAAN! (shakes fist at sky)

That's the movie I point to if I'm ever asked to define "pretentious."
I was in a horror-comedy called BLACK HOLLER. It's now on Prime Video. Check it out!
Reply
#59
It deserved one award. It won four, all of them wrong.

Fuck Eddie Redmayne.
"PREDATOR 2 feels like it was penned by convicts as part of a correctional facility's creative writing program, and that's what I love about it." - Moltisanti
Reply
#60
Keaton should have won for that movie about burgers.
Reply
#61
I don't think BEYOND has aged particularly well but it's nowhere near as bad as INTO DARKNESS.
"Nooj's true feelings on any given subject are unknown and unknowable. He is the butterfly flapping its wings in Peking. He is chaos and destruction and you shall never see his true form." - Merriweather

My Steam ID: yizashigreyspear
Reply
#62
INTO THE DARKNESS and BEYOND were both fairly sorry, to the point that they've soured me on the '09 movie which I liked back then.

The only one of the new cast that was a fitting successor was Urban.
Reply
#63
Urban is my least favorite new cast member. He never goes beyond a DeForest impression for me.
Reply
#64
(11-07-2019, 04:54 PM)Alt-molt Wrote: Keaton should have won for that movie about burgers.

The Founder is so good.
Reply
#65
I'd nominate any of the later Transformers movies I was too weary to suffer through any more, but I guess you should at least see a bad film to nominate it. Lots of good picks already, I'll add the recent Robin Hood movie, for it's tired reinvention of the character yet again, cheapness, lazy plotting, unexplained peoples revolution, stupid machine gun bows and arrows, and excessive posing.

Honestly can't choose between the stupidity of Into Darkness, or the banality of Beyond.
There are weapons in my hands, my hands are weapons.
Reply
#66
I'm stunned to see so much shade thrown at STAR TREK BEYOND. I think it's a lot of fun.
If we can dream it, then we can do it.
Reply
#67
agreed. Then again, it's been a while since my last viewing so who knows.
Reply
#68
Along the lines of Poltergeist, remakes everyone has forgotten about:

A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)
Arthur (2011)
Straw Dogs (2011)
The Thing (2011)
Total Recall (2012)
Red Dawn (2012)
Oldboy (2013) (Sorry, Spike!)
Carrie (2013)
Robocop (2014)
Point Break (2015)
Flatliners (2017)
Reply
#69
(11-07-2019, 05:39 PM)atomtastic Wrote: Total Recall (2012)

Arnold sure doesn't think much of it (skip to the 23:30 mark):


Reply
#70
(11-07-2019, 05:39 PM)atomtastic Wrote: The Thing (2011)

Actually, this wasn't bad.  It's not close to the original but it's pretty watchable.
Reply


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)