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A Nice Hard Slap - Nick's Daily Blog
#71
Ironically enough, "the back of Peter Cushing's head" could probably be taken two ways.

How is Penny doing, by the way?
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#72
Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick's Blog

I don't mean to disparage folks who have been unable to create a familiar. It's really not easy. There's all sorts of possible complications. In fact, I believe my mother had five or six miscarriages throughout the years following my arrival. I scorched the Earth on my way out, just in case...

Classic!
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#73
You're in your earliest 30s. You're 30. But you look 32.

Great blog. Save for being wrong about Jeanne Tripplehorn, as usual.
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#74
Quote:

Originally Posted by LisaNewYork
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Ironically enough, "the back of Peter Cushing's head" could probably be taken two ways.

How is Penny doing, by the way?

She is 7 months old and HUGE. The body of a dog with the mind of a puppy is a crazy thing. She's great, developing into a very special little lady dog. Thanks for asking.
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#75
I would have sold all you guys into white slavery if our waitress asked me to.
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#76
She was insane. Insane. She knew how hot she was but also knew we could overpower her and Casualties of War her ass, so she was kind of awkward and nerdy in a really cute way too. Aside from Steve, who is crap, everyone would have screwed Bob Gunton to get to her.
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#77
So Steve was the Michael J. Fox of the group?

If so, was he shaking?
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#78
There is a LOT of fucking going on in Mary Worth War.

And apparently your local restaurants.
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#79
Quote:

I mean, sure I rub my kid's nose in her shit... or anyone's shit for that matter, but aside from that it's a clean argument.

Fuck you Nick. I can't laugh that hard in a computer lab! My peers will see me, think I'm an idiot, and ostracize me - then I'll have no career. Your blog is killing my future.
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#80
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/25/A-...lap-12608.html
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#81
Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick Nunziata
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She was insane. Insane. She knew how hot she was but also knew we could overpower her and Casualties of War her ass, so she was kind of awkward and nerdy in a really cute way too. Aside from Steve, who is crap, everyone would have screwed Bob Gunton to get to her.

Yes.

I also would've poisoned Steve with some strange virus.
Oh, wait....
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#82
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/32/A-...lap-12708.html
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#83
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/33/A-...lap-12808.html
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#84
My wife is Chinese and she's more terrified of Asian drivers than I am. You think it's bad on the highway, try parking in the lot of a Chinese grocery store.

I find the mega-SUV drivers to be much worse than the Mercedes shitheads around here.
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#85
Huh. So Asians aren't good drivers? Wow, that's weird.

I wonder why that would be. Maybe because they're too busy smiling and taking pictures?
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#86
And "My stumps ache for healing" makes it's encore performance. Excellent.
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#87
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/44/A-...lap-12908.html
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#88
That reminds me of an excellent flicker set I saw several months ago about someone visiting the Godzilla monster museum. The suits were beautiful.
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#89
They truly are. If he hadn't died in the 70's I think we'd have more fanboy lust for him.
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#90
The payoff for that Mary Worth War was fantastic, and you definitely got me intrigued about the Eiji Tsuburaya book.
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#91
Leon Rippy.
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#92
One of the best MWWs ever. "You're lucky I eat with my lady beatin' hand."
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#93
I saw King Kong Vs. Godzilla when I was like 6 or 7. I was in a giant Godzilla lust, getting excited every Friday when I got to pick a new one from the shelf at Blockbuster (it was the second row, far left, the two bottom shelves. Once, I spent two weeks very upset till my dad pointed out the two Godzilla's that overlapped onto the top shelf of the next section that I was too short too see.). Either way, when I watched that and saw the ending I fucking cried. No lie, I fucking cried. It blew because the next one I watched had big G fighting the big Rose monster (name escapes me) and I cried again when he fell into a volcano.
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#94
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/45/A-...lap-13008.html
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#95
Quote:

Originally Posted by TheMonsterZero
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I saw King Kong Vs. Godzilla when I was like 6 or 7. I was in a giant Godzilla lust, getting excited every Friday when I got to pick a new one from the shelf at Blockbuster (it was the second row, far left, the two bottom shelves. Once, I spent two weeks very upset till my dad pointed out the two Godzilla's that overlapped onto the top shelf of the next section that I was too short too see.). Either way, when I watched that and saw the ending I fucking cried. No lie, I fucking cried. It blew because the next one I watched had big G fighting the big Rose monster (name escapes me) and I cried again when he fell into a volcano.

So what happened when you found out the original Godzilla was really just an evil people stomping bastard?
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#96
Crisco fists? Fecal Matrix code? ROACOIWMI!?

Why haven't you always had a blog? Wonderful.
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#97
So is Crisco Fists a Halo team?
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#98
It is now.

That was fantastic. You drew me in with the serious suggestion and then crisco fisted me from there. I agree with the time freeze thing - that'd be fucking sweet. Firefox is on the right track, but you'd think there'd be more innovation in browsers by now. As for safari... with the newest version I don't find any significant differences between it and firefox - besides being uglier.
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#99
Great blog as usual, sir.
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Just a request... Would be nice if the subject or subtitle of a particular blog appeared on the "Blogs by this Author" page following the title "A Nice Hard Slap". Otherwise, there's just a date to go by (A Nice Hard Slap (1.25.08), etc), when reading through them. Especially since they all seem to begin the exact same way:

"Welcome to the latest mind-blistering missive from my spent casing of a noggin, filled to the rim with shinola and burgeoning with backwash and partially chewed Red Vines.I've decided that the 'Sla... "

See Andre's for example: "Dellamorte's Dugout: My Impression of Norman Fell"

It's hard to go back and reference anything or know if I already read a particular one. Just a nitpick and I only pointed it out because I plan on reading each of them.

GREAT stuff, by the by.
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Quote:

An album that we used to have, the one we got our first wet hump to.

(*Sobs*) Please, no...

Seriously, great as always, Nick - thanks for these.
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That might be my favorite one.

"The wrong half!!"
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Quote:

Originally Posted by LisaNewYork
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(*Sobs*) Please, no...

Air Supply?
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You're frighteningly close...
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Long ass one. An a brand new Mary Worth!

http://chud.com/articles/blogs/53/A-...and-Johan.html
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