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We Are Going to Blog You
The Daily Show just interviewed this group, then had their behavior analyzed by a child psychologist. Awesome.
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Originally Posted by Phil
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That PUMA gal looks like a barrel of laughs.

And yet I bet she goes to fifth base on the first date.
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http://chud.com/articles/blogs/1165/...g-Doritos.html
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It's the price that does me in. I see the hot dogs by the counter at 7-11 and even though I KNOW it won't taste as fresh as I hope and I KNOW I will have terrible heartburn later, it's such a small expense that I find myself saying "why not? It's only $1!"
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Tieman
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It's the price that does me in. I see the hot dogs by the counter at 7-11 and even though I KNOW it won't taste as fresh as I hope and I KNOW I will have terrible heartburn later, it's such a small expense that I find myself saying "why not? It's only $1!"

This. "It's only a hot dog, with mediocre chili and half-burnt cheese substitute...what could go wrong?!?"

Two hours later I'm practically eating Alka-Seltzer just so that the searing pain of an ulcerated esophagus will take away from those godawful burps.
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It's mind-boggling how once you leave the NY-metro area, there are no good pizza joints. You can count on Andy Garcia's fingers the amount of quality pizza joints outside of NYC.
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There is actually a Joe's Pizza in Santa Monica.
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I once had some nasty lemon-flavored Doritos in Japan...at least, that's what the image on the yellow package promised. I knew I wouldn't like it, but I had to experience the novelty. It certainly didn't taste like lemon (kind of relieved about that, actually). Just some salty filth that I can't even remember with any precision.

I still like good ol' American Doritos though, especially Cool Ranch (are they still calling them "Cooler" Ranch?).
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Remember Bravos? They were like Doritos, but round. And with a shoddier factory, apparently, because every so often, you'd get a bag with three chips and a meteorite of powdered cheese and salt.

I fucking LOVED biting into that thing.
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* the other day I called a local pizzeria and asked for a large pie. No shit, the guy on the phone goes 'Pie? Why you calling a pizza place for pie?'

Wow, I know when I lived in Ohio for a few years, I'd go to pizza places and they wondered where this 'pie' term came from. Up until I found the only pizza place that I ever found outside of NYC that was owned by a former NYC native and was absolutely ecstatic that I called it a large pie. And somehow it tasted slightly better, probably because of the New Yawker sweat in the dough. It's all about the water.

People make fun of NYC water, but I still can't drink tap outside of New York. It's either too metallic tasting or almost chalk like. Montezuma's Revenge is also a known fun fact.

And being fact is really the only reason I still am compelled to buy 3 taquitos for $3.33. Because I know my stomach implodes the moment I buy them. Like a kid who's been molested by his uncle and sees him again 20 years later.
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http://chud.com/articles/blogs/1309/...ld-Pricks.html
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Fantastic. Seriously.
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Your political articles are great. I wish you'd blog more often.
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http://chud.com/articles/blogs/1737/...less-Girl.html
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im glad you ended up printing it somewhere. thank you.
(@divisionary)
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That was a really moving piece, Devin. Thank you for sharing it on CHUD. Articles like this remind me that there's more to you than what alot of Chewers complain about. This article also serves as a mirror, showing those that read it a reflection of themselves as they recall similar situations that they've been in. I can honestly say that I've been in situations similar to the one you described in your blog. And the feelings you describe feel familiar. Having been a latch-key kid growing up, television and movies were what raised me since both of my parents worked alot.

Because of that, I have also spent most of my life with two viewpoints - one that sees things around him like he's in a movie, and one that sees things with the stark reality that's really there. And it is certainly tough to reconcile the two sometimes. Especially during moments like this, where the situation almost seems like something straight out of a film. Doesn't help that the homeless girl is as attractive as you say, because of course homeless folks in films are usually played by attractive people just like the rest. It makes the fine line between the two harder to define, and adds alot of extra conflict to a situation already struggling for a resolution.

Alot of food for thought with this article. Thanks again for sharing it.
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Very nice work Devin. Sincere and thought-provoking.
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One of the best blogs I've read here. Thanks for that.
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Anyone living in a city can identify with everything you wrote. Don't feel too horribly for anything you did or didn't do.
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Great read indeed. Thanks for sharing.
I usually don't give money anymore, i'm too cynic and aware that the kids asking for money on the street have handlers who are basically slaving them. So i only give food. If i'm eating somewhere or cross a kid on the street, i'll buy them food or give them whatever i'm eating.
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Wow. I'm not one to get emotional over anything but this actually affected me a bit.

The problem is that when you're faced with this dichotomy of social class day in and day out you have to do one of two things: block it out or become a socially ineffective mess.

Even living in a moderately sized city will expose a person to the type of human failure that you describe in this piece. Depending on how you react to the societal periphery is going to make you callous, make you cynical, or make you a target.

The solution is that we turn our surroundings into set dressing. Every soul that we pass on the street becomes a cosmetic fixture to our personal story; a blank page that makes life more bearable.

People will still what they can do to make a difference, but when you take into account the human suffering that falls through the cracks, or isn't perceived by us due to geography or apathy, all we can really achieve is our own sense of altruism.

I agree with, Phil. Don't feel too horribly about anything you did or didn't do, because there are thousands of that girl out there and there is nothing that you or I can do to help their situation. Dwelling on that fact would only make you crazy.
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This has to be one of the best things you've ever written, Devin.

Even though we have just a tiny fraction of the problem you have in the US this happens to me from time to time. My conscious mind is always telling me to be cynical and just ignore them but in the back of my head there's always the possibility that my act of unkindness will be the one really breaks them. It can get you pretty depressed if you let it. But only for a while.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Phil
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Anyone living in a city can identify with everything you wrote. Don't feel too horribly for anything you did or didn't do.

Exactly. I beat myself up for every time I don't give someone money - hell, I did it this past weekend in SF. I passed a guy who asked if I had any change, I did the obligatory pocket-patting and "No man, sorry, no change on me", and sort of drifted by. All of a sudden I heard him yell "Have a nice life, sir. Have a lot of kids. Have ten kids. Nah, have twenty. Twenty's a good number." I turned to him and kinda grinned, and he said "Nah, I'm just kidding, that'd suck. You and I'd be fightin' for real estate out here." We both laughed.

I regretted not having any change.

Same with an older guy that hangs out at the 7-11 up the street. I always saw him sitting out front, reading. Battered books, new books, mass market paperbacks, classics, genre crap, whatever. A couple of months ago I was clearing out a bookshelf, getting rid of a few odds and ends that I was just going to put outside on the curb and let people rummage through, when I thought of the guy. So I stuck a few books in my messenger bag and went about the rest of my week, hoping to see him there at the 7-11. For about a week, I saw nothing. Concern set in, and eventually it sort of waned. I still haven't seen him, and even though I took those few books out and put them back up on the shelf, I still think about that guy when I see them and wonder what happened to him.

It's easy to see how someone could fall through the cracks, especially in this town, for many of the same reasons you mentioned. We've got the endless cliche of people who come out here all starry-eyed and end up waiting tables and bartending, but I haven't seen so much about people who come out here all starry-eyed, stumble, and don't get back up for a very, very long time. If ever.

Great blogpost.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by devincf
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What the fuck are these? Do they simulate being high?

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Quote:

Originally Posted by devincf
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No need to apologize for this blog.

I think we've all had way too many Sliding Doors moments. Head would probably explode if shown the butterfly effect-like consequences of even smallest indecision.

"Got concrete rhymes, been rappin' for ten years and

Even when I'm braggin', I'm bein' sincere"



"Teenage angst has paid off well/ Now I'm bored and old"


"Drunk as hell, but no throwin' up

Half way home and my pager still blowin' up"


"I'm tired of living all alone
yeah, nobody ever calls me on the phone
But when things start getting bad
I just play my music louder"





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I have night terrors

http://chud.com/articles/blogs/1874/...t-Terrors.html
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Hahah awesome. Please do keep them coming. Surprised you didn't dream with Freddy after that set visit. Seemed like the perfect subconscious thing to do.
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My night terrors never seem to make any sense. They're almost never actually commenting on anything going on in my life.
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My wife does something similar, but I don't think they are night terrors. She just occasionally does stuff in her sleep. A few months ago we were on our anniversary weekend getaway and we were staying at a Bed & Breakfast. At one point in the middle of the night she gets out of bed and starts looking around the bed. I ask her what she's doing and she says that she dropped her pencil and was trying to find it. After a couple of minutes I convinced her that there was no pencil and that it was okay to go back to sleep.



And kudos to your girlfriend, Devin for being that cool about your nocturnal activities. I don't always get to sleep in the same room when I snore.
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My night terrors are nowhere near as interesting or comical as your experiences, but every once in a while I will start screaming in my sleep, or nonsenically be trying to call for help. Nine times out of ten I'm dreaming that I'm being attacked by some unseen entity in my sleep. It's a meta thing.
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I think I had a night terror once back in high school, I apparently bolted out my room and into the living and started babbling incoherently to my mom for a bit before turning around and going back to bed.
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