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Gash Wednesday, The Blog of Andrea Rothe
#36
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/1924/...NESDAY-11.html
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#37
Here's the latest, folks!

http://chud.com/articles/blogs/1938/...NESDAY-12.html
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#38
While I agree with mostly with what you said, I think either way it comes down to drive and determination and focus.

I barely scraped through high school and afterwards spent 4 years working as a lowly supermarket butchery cleaner, and it delft a fairly hefty blow to my confidence. I'd bump into people I had known in high school and they were studying to be this or that important sounding thing while I was scrubbing dried cow blood off the ceiling for minimum wage. I eventually reached a breaking point and quit and I guess like you said realized I needed to grow some balls and do the crazy innovative thing (not that I'd as yet count my self amongst the ranks of the successful), but it could so easily have gone the other way. Broken my spirit and led me to accept my meager station in the world, and settled for it.

When you look around the staff break room of any of those type of jobs, they are full of broken people like that. I assume they had dreams and aspirations at one stage in their lives, and now sit with dead eyes pretending to care about the dull conversations they're engaged with, with other beaten looking people. I wonder if they had gone to college, would the confidence boost of earning a degree, even if it went unused for the rest of their days have led them to a happier more satisfying life.
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#39
Holy shit, that ended up far more depressing than I intended when I started writing.
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#40
Yes, it's Thursday. Enjoy yourselves anyway.

http://chud.com/articles/blogs/1949/...NESDAY-13.html
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#41
You're welcome.

http://chud.com/articles/blogs/1959/...NESDAY-14.html
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#42
I just got to reading some of these today and there's a bunch of good stuff in them, especially the money management one and the one about laughing at yourself. I like the attitude you present all of them with though, there's a little aggression and sass, good amounts of humour, a spirit of curiosity.

In response to the piece about how your Dad lives/lived his life compared to how you feel life should be lived I was with you up until you said he's a research scientist. I'm more of the outwardly adventurous type, the jumping off cliffs, paddling out into big surf, living in the Amazon jungle for 6 months type of idiot, but I look up to scientists as one of the very greatest callings a human being can have. Physicists particularly, they may be bookish cats like your Dad, days spent in labs and books and computer screens, but to me that kind of life is every bit as experimental and exploratory as living somewhere utterly foriegn or testing yourself in the more extreme conditions Mother Nature provides us. Scientists live on the edge of the bounds of human knowledge, out in places you can't travel by floatplane or canoe, and that's a helluva place to live your life.

And in response to the piece about cack choices of attire in public, I don't have any gear with cartoon characters on it and I don't pay much attention to what's on t-shirts in general (most of mine came free from building supplies companies) but if someone bought me an Angry Beavers t-shirt I'd wear the shit out of it all over public. God would I wear that.
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#43
I'm glad you're no longer enduring threats and bruises. I also think you're right about often times people getting in their own way more than anything else stopping them.



Quote:

Originally Posted by Bucho
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In response to the piece about how your Dad lives/lived his life compared to how you feel life should be lived I was with you up until you said he's a research scientist. I'm more of the outwardly adventurous type, the jumping off cliffs, paddling out into big surf, living in the Amazon jungle for 6 months type of idiot, but I look up to scientists as one of the very greatest callings a human being can have. Physicists particularly, they may be bookish cats like your Dad, days spent in labs and books and computer screens, but to me that kind of life is every bit as experimental and exploratory as living somewhere utterly foriegn or testing yourself in the more extreme conditions Mother Nature provides us. Scientists live on the edge of the bounds of human knowledge, out in places you can't travel by floatplane or canoe, and that's a helluva place to live your life.

Yeah, but Vanilla waffers? you don't know where the box ends and the waffers begin with those things. I think a little balance between the cerebral cortex and the adrenalin gland is healthy. It makes me wonder about what his upbringing was like, did he only get lettuce sandwiches as a kid etc. But I'm conflicted because I don't like to pry into other peoples lives, but then it was the subject of the blog. I think I'll er on the side of shutting up.
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#44
I'd just like to say I really like your blogs, Andrea. Great stuff.
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#45
Quote:

Originally Posted by horrid
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Yeah, but Vanilla waffers? you don't know where the box ends and the waffers begin with those things. I think a little balance between the cerebral cortex and the adrenalin gland is healthy.

That point wasn't lost on me when Andrea wrote the piece, but it is true that sometimes Dads will do goofy things like that in a way to share something with their kid. "It's our little secret." Kids love secrets. Obviously he misjudged it because Andrea didn't read it that way, as a cool secret to share with her dad, but what I mean is that the fact he may have presented it like the ultimate in daring to his kid, it doesn't mean he actually believed that.

But my point about celebrating science as a calling was that there are hundreds of thousands of factory workers and janitors and car salesmen and plumbers who've lived a similarly outwardly unadventurous life. So even though Andrea's dad never bloodied his knuckles or rapelled out of a helicopter, his working life - the majority of his waking hours - have been spent doing and seeing things most of us just won't ever have the talent/privilege/creativity/vision to experience, let alone make such significant contributions to humanity as scientists and engineers do. It's certainly not any kind of wasted life as I see it.

Also, maybe he's a top secret government agent.

(There's no offence meant by any of this Andrea; like I hopefully made clear earlier, I enjoy your style and I respect your intelligence and thoughtfulness, and I'm certainly not saying you're wrong. Just that maybe you haven't looked at it from the viewpoint that came to mind for me when I read it. Or maybe you have and I'm wrong. Either way, thanks.)
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#46
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/1967/...NESDAY-15.html

Another autobiographical one this time.

Thanks to all who've been following my blogs. It's hard to put yourself out there, and I'm baffled and encouraged that anyone reads these.

Thanks, Horrid and Bucho for your commentary. You're right about my dad's job. It's amazing. If you think of Stephen Hawking... that mind locked up inside that body... he quite literally explored the universe in spite of his physical handicaps. There's something to be said about that. On the other hand, you can't and shouldn't let a job define you. You need a personal life too. With things and activities you share with others. You gotta do things that make for great stories. Life is too short.

Bucho, great insight on the college blog. I think you're right. Perhaps the boost in confidence a college education gives is currency in and of itself. Never thought of it that way.

Also... thanks, Dross!

Enjoy the latest!
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#47
Wow that could not have been easy to write. This may not be my place and I hope it doesn't backfire on me in a"I can talk about my family but you can't" kind of way but your Mom was a crazy bitch, who really had no right treating you that way. It was almost like watching a Del Toro movie without the fantastical manifesting itself.

I remeber on rides to school hating when my mother would spit onto a hankey to clean my "grubby face" I cant imagine the kind of headspace you'd have to be in to actually spit on your own child though.

Another thing that sort of made me tilt my head and say wha? was the Letting God in the car part. It just seemed like a physicist and a Religious nut would be an odd pairing to begin with.

Anyway thanks for having the strength to share that one.
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#48
Something as simple as the way you use present tense brings these already evocative little car stories even more vividly to life, it gives them a currency that opens them up and makes the little stings you pepper through them bite deeper and leaves the underlying mood ringing with an undeniable poignancy. (I don't know if poignancy is a real word but that doesn't really matter.)

And it was Horrid with the great insight on the college blog by the way, and not yours truly, but I'll take the credit for it anyway.
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#49
Something as simple as the way you use present tense brings these already evocative little car stories even more vividly to life, it gives them a currency that opens them up and makes the little stings you pepper through them bite deeper and leaves the underlying mood ringing with an undeniable poignancy. (I don't know if poignancy is a real word but that doesn't really matter.)

And it was Horrid with the great insight on the college blog by the way, and not yours truly, but I'll take the credit for it anyway.
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#50
The newest. Enjoy!

http://chud.com/articles/blogs/1981/...NESDAY-16.html
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#51
Quote:

I've even tried a generously large cubic zirconia ring.

Hahahaha. Oh, miss. That will do nothing. I recommend burping, farting, picking your nose and pretending to eat it. You need to stir up some straight-up revulsion to end the leering, the looking, the throbbing. We're fucking animals.
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#52
Quote:

Originally Posted by Andrea

*LOTS OF WINDOWLICKING PERVS*

You should have thrown a cup of your own urine on that window late one night before going back into the fray the following morning. Hell, I'd have done it every night.
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#53
This entry completely bummed me out and I've never done anything of the cat-calling, intrusive verbal rapist variety. I think that means success!
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#54
Sorry Andrea I couldn't concentrate on reading any of that on account of being so dazzled by your ass.

Honestly though, Phil nailed it, there is unavoidably a certain class of fuckwit that if you do want to respond you can only beat them by dropping to their level. The other thing you could try is to talk back to these dipshits in a Fran Drescher voice or something similarly nasal and aurally hideous. "Oh, aren't you just a sweetie-pie with all of your compliments, is that Shakespeare you're quoting?" or, "Thank you honey, you look great too, your mommy obviously paid extra special attention when she dressed her special boy this morning." You can't say them with snark though, you have to sell the character as if you're utterly sincere. But with vocal chords that could be used to hail ships in the fog. They think they're the dominant person in the interaction and that's where the buzz is for them, so reverse it on them by talking to them as if you really see them as a child.
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#55
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2000/...NESDAY-17.html

Christmas in August. you're welcome.
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#56
Are you the one not smiling?
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#57
Fantastic blog entry. You do a fantastic job of vividly evoking a specific time and place, and personal esoteric set of emotions.
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#58
It was real. Very nice bit of writing Andrea, the air of tension and the ducking of it, the solace in the hallway. I could almost smell that tree myself.
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#59
Quote:

Originally Posted by Renn Brown
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Fantastic blog entry. You do a fantastic job of vividly evoking a specific time and place, and personal esoteric set of emotions.

Agreed, these are more like selected scenes from a novel than a mere blog (By mere blog I am of course referring to your blog, Renn (kidding)).

You definitely have some talent here, Ma'am.

I was also going to make some kind of taking "deck the halls" too literally joke, but I couldn't figure out how to make it funny.
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#60
Thanks so much, guys! I love to write!! Appreciate the encouragement. It's interesting how things come full circle. You know you go through that stuff for a reason. You don't want to live life as a martyr. You want to use it. And I've been blessed from above with words. Without them, I'd not be in as good shape as I am now. Have a lot to be thankful for.

nekkerbee, Yes, that's me not smiling. Not sure what my problem was. Teenage angst?
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#61
The word martyr. Quota. MET.
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#62
Quote:

Originally Posted by 88 Inches
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Thanks so much, guys! I love to write!! Appreciate the encouragement. It's interesting how things come full circle. You know you go through that stuff for a reason. You don't want to live life as a martyr. You want to use it. And I've been blessed from above with words. Without them, I'd not be in as good shape as I am now. Have a lot to be thankful for.

Sure Andrea, it's like Myq Kaplan says - "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Which is why people in comas are always so ripped. (Have you seen Hard To Kill?)".

I think we can all agree with that.
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#63
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2017/...NESDAY-18.html

Uncharted subject matter as of yet. Enjoy!
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#64
Walk a mile in an Albatross's shoes he spends weeks at a time flying over the sea, blue above, below, infront, behind, left, and right, this maybe the reason albatrosses are more partial towards B&W photography than painting. Also hanging around people necks.
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#65
Though this bitch is my bestest pal in town and I'm biased, this blog is quickly classing this joint up nicely.
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#66
I have to agree. There is enough quality on display here to make the blogs a first-rate operation.

Great book title in the works here: My Struggle With Blue...
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#67
The first paragraph and a half I was thinking, nah, this one seems like hard work, her sickness is clogging the prose. Then from, "Sometimes the journey ..." it's just astoundingly good, an intriguing and illuminating insight into a part of your artistic mind that is at once foreign and familiar to me. And that last paragraph where you talk about the disconcerting disorientation of having the endless, bottomless sky beneath you, that's one of those simple, primal things that must be pretty much universal but it's something I've never heard anyone else talk about. Killer last words too, dramatically evocative as all get out.
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#68
The newest. Enjoy!

http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2039/...NESDAY-19.html
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#69
Scary words, run away. If our bubble takes any more hits like that it could burst.
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#70
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2048/...NESDAY-20.html

The latest! Enjoy, folks.
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