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Gash Wednesday, The Blog of Andrea Rothe
#71
I hate that I missed #19. That was pretty great, as was this latest one. Keep 'em coming!
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#72
This may be a fucked up thought, but I Was watching a documentary on Crocodiles once, and they were showing how before they go on a hunt they will lie in the sun for half an hour to heat themselves up because with reptiles the temperature of their blood directly affects their perception, the warmer they get the faster their reflexes become and they begin to see the world like it's in slow motion. So while it's sad the little lizard died, in his final moments he probably saw the world with a clarity few of us could ever hope to achieve.

On the other hand it probably made the suffering seem that much longer, but don't think about that or you might feel bad about yourself again.

Telling you not to think about that, didn't work did it? You're probably thinking about it right now, and it's going to put you in a bad mood that will last the whole week, and it's all my fault.


Sorry.
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#73
I hope someone leaves you in the sun, horrid.
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#74
Being half Irish I doubt I'd outlast the lizard.
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#75
Haha! You guys are great.
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#76
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2058/...NESDAY-21.html

The newest. A pretty quick one this time. Thanks for reading, folks.
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#77
Swap jelly beans for salted cashews, and you are living my dream.
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#78
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2065/...NESDAY-22.html

The newest. Enjoy!
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#79
Quote:

Originally Posted by 88 Inches
View Post
The newest. Enjoy!

But in moderation.
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#80
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2071/...D-library.html

The newest. This one's about... MOVIES. *gasp!*
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#81
I'm following the same route of not focusing on having a collection but more on keeping movies I will watch again.

Never, EVER feel embarrassed about owning a Streisand movie
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#82
http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2088/...039s-Case.html

Enjoy, folks!
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#83
Nice to have you back after last weeks gashtric bypass. If you're not going to keep him, I'd suggest getting rid of him sooner rather that later. We had a quiet dog, and when we got another louder dog it didn't take too long before the quiet one started copying his more ( I want to say obnoxious, but he's dead, and aside from the barking he was awesome, so I wont) loudmouthed brother.
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#84
THURSDAY EDITION!! This means I had to take my dog to the vet yesterday for an emergency and the blog didn't happen. Boo! But here you go, folks.

http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2097/...the-doors.html
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#85
Have you run into the ones that make you answer a 4 page multiple choice, customer service test, with lots of gray questions and nothing but black and white answers? Those are fun to spend an hour doing knowing that if you get one wrong it probably goes straight to the don't bother looking at this applicant bin.

I'm in kind of an awkward position because I want to switch jobs, but I've asked for 2 weeks off around New Years, so I don't want to switch jobs because getting that time off from a New employer is unlikely, but It's a little uncertain if the store I work at will still be around by then, so I could end up stranded.
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#86
But... but... it's FRIDAY! Shut up. Here you go anyway. Enjoy!

http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2103/...is-Jordan.html
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#87
Striking work.

It's one thing to hear the stories of six foot deep piles of plastic debris on the windward side of islands, or the 100 million tons worth of "plastic soup" that floats in the Pacific between the USA and Japan, but it's quite something else to witness its direct impact on the ecosystem. This is some of the most effective photography I've ever seen.

It's a strange quirk of the clash of wildlife with industrial age that the albatross parents pick up this flotsam and jetsam believing it to be food. Mass-produced plastic has only been around for less than a century (about three or four albatross generations) and appears to us nothing like what we'd expect an albatross's natural diet to look, smell and feel like. One can only hope evolution breeds this tendency out of the population while it can still sustain itself, because there's no way human beings are going to solve it.

Also, out of work + vet bills. Ouch.
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#88
Andrea, whatever became of Barlow?
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#89
Kept Barlow! He turned out to be a great animal. I was beginning to think of getting another dog anyway, and he luckily showed up at what I now realize is the right time.
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#90
The newest. Back to another autobiographical one this time. I try to change it up so it's not always the same old blog about the same old stuff. Hope you enjoy.

http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2108/...39s-Jeans.html
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#91
Wow. Your autobiographical ones are really fantastic. Your style changes a little when it becomes personal. Love it.
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#92
Perfectly noble and perfectly human. And perfectly told.
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#93
You are great at giving things a sort of haunting grace. You write pretty, for someone so into poop.
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#94
Thanks, guys. Glad there are a handful of people out there enjoying the blogs.

As for poop, imagine my embarrassment yesterday when I told a potential employer when he asked about my writing skills to check out chud.com. I couldn't change the picture or bio fast enough. I'm sure he saw my seaweed crotch and read my profession of love for poop. I figured, fuckit, I'll leave it. What's done is done. But.... crap!!
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#95
Another one for you beings.

http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2132/...e-Nirvana.html
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#96
There are enough blogs about films and all that malarky already and I'm not about to go undamning maturity or casting any stones and/or judgements in this filthy glasshouse. Speed Jew and Spartacus Crapped would be splendid names for a boat or WW2 plane. Or maybe a flying boat.
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#97
Phone scrabble is the light of my toilet life. Dictionaries are for phat twats.
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#98
Nice, Renn! I forgot to get a screen grab of that fucker!
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#99
I keep meaning to check out the scrabble app on facebook. Thanks for the reminder!

Quote:

Originally Posted by 88 Inches
View Post
As for poop, imagine my embarrassment yesterday when I told a potential employer when he asked about my writing skills to check out chud.com. I couldn't change the picture or bio fast enough. I'm sure he saw my seaweed crotch and read my profession of love for poop. I figured, fuckit, I'll leave it. What's done is done. But.... crap!!

This made me giggle. Hope it went well!
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I just checked out the Scrabble app and there's one for Us and Canada and one for the rest of the world. So I'd be forced to play other dirty foreign types like Bucho? NO THANKS.
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I don't know any words with more than 4 letters so you'd be fine mate. Except the word letters. And the word except.
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http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2203/...Library-2.html

Newest. Skipped a couple of weeks because I got a new job, but I promise I'll keep this up. Just a quick one this week.
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Congrats on the job!
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http://chud.com/articles/blogs/2312/...g-No-salt.html

I'm back! Enjoy, guys.
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I think good on you for buying your own table and course correcting from other peoples mistakes that could have lead you to further unhappiness.


I remember our family table starting out fairly uneventful, but getting more awkward as my folks headed for divorce, though I don't remember any particulars. I do remember after the divorce The table ended up at my Dad's place where I'd stay on weekends. Every 4 months or so he'd have a dinner for all his work colleagues and associates and stuff, mostly my dad was a pretty good guy, but these occasion were like a show for him, and he became a total dick. Me and my brother always hated these performances and would hide down in my room, it being the further-est away from the dinning room. Even as kids we could recognize these people as sniveling sycophants, and couldn't stand to be forced to listen to them prattle on about boring work stuff, bursting into false laughter at each others unfunny jokes. It did all lead up to a fairly life defining moment however.

When the meal was ready we'd be forced to take our place at the table. And that's basically where I learned to be quick witted. I'd see my dad quote Oscar Wilde and Winston Churchill to make himself sound witty, and I hated the lie of it. It was plagiarism in my mind, using something clever someone else said to garner your own laughs. The other thing my dad would do would be to make fun of me in front of all his kiss ass work pals, knowing I just had to grin and take it. Until one day I didn't, I shot barbs back at him, he shot weaker ones back, and I followed up with even better ones. First there was an awkward quiet over the work colleagues, then I started winning them over. You got the impression they were sick of the charade too. I beat him at his own stupid game, and I'm pretty sure I actually gained some respect from him for it too. It didn't stop at the dinning room table either, this new found confidence traveled with me to school, I became someone you didn't make fun of to his face because I would cut you down in front of all your friends and embarrass the shit out of you. Since high school the skill has morphed from an angsty defense mechanism to more affable pun making, it's something that's mellowed with me, and I get a lot more fun out of it now, but I probably wouldn't have it without all those horrible times spent at that dinner table.

Not that I'm comparing your day to day struggles with a near broken home with me having to put up with chumps maybe 3 times a year. I'm actually amazed you have come out of your upbringing with your sanity and niceness intact.
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