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THE DARK KNIGHT RISES Post-release thread.....

The whole segment that serves as a validation for chiropractic science and the power of MIND OVER MATTER. HOLISTIC HEALING! CHRISTIAN SCIENCE!!! 

I've followed the Noojian Drama of TDKR for years now. After so much training and preparation, I still was not prepared for the Bat Gimp Harness. For Force Ghost Liam Neeson. The stupidest fucking police department ever committed to film.

It really was So Bad. And in that moment, I knew Truth, and became one with the cosmos.



The Batwing looks like a fucking june bug.

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AWhat about the special forces team that's easily slaughtered by Bane's goons after accomplishing absolute nothing towards the plot.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov View Post
 

The whole segment that serves as a validation for chiropractic science and the power of MIND OVER MATTER. HOLISTIC HEALING! CHRISTIAN SCIENCE!!! 

I've followed the Noojian Drama of TDKR for years now. After so much training and preparation, I still was not prepared for the Bat Gimp Harness. For Force Ghost Liam Neeson. The stupidest fucking police department ever committed to film.

It really was So Bad. And in that moment, I knew Truth, and became one with the cosmos.



The Batwing looks like a fucking june bug.



It's just THE BAT, Zhukov.  Gawd.  Batwing sounds like a toy for babies, not an urban assault vehicle for the most baddest vigilante ninja evah.

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It's called The Bat, you twits...



and yes it does come in black.



Edit: Schwatz beat me to it.

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I like how Gordon carries his Harvery Dent speech wherever he goes... for emergencies?

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I thought he left it in his coat pocket from that night when he was about to say it.

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A[quote name="catartik" url="/community/t/144220/the-dark-knight-rises-post-release-thread/5460#post_3930804"]What about the special forces team that's easily slaughtered by Bane's goons after accomplishing absolute nothing towards the plot.[/quote]
Accomplished NOTHING?? Batman seeing their bodies hung from the bridge made him throw a cup at that nice 71" plasma that Bane had installed in the DEATH PIT and do sit ups more purposefully..
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(looks upon the multitudes... pleased...)

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Carnotaur3 View Post
 

I thought he left it in his coat pocket from that night when he was about to say it.


Hmmmm.... Perhaps I need to rewatch

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A[quote name="Carnotaur3" url="/community/t/144220/the-dark-knight-rises-post-release-thread/5460#post_3930830"]I thought he left it in his coat pocket from that night when he was about to say it.
[/quote]
He has it in his coat the night of the...thing...Harvey Dent anniversary memorial(?)at Wayne's mansion. Selina kidnaps that Senator (or whoever)...for a few days I'd thought, because he's on the TV as missing. Then Gordon and SWAT are looking for him (after the Senator's cell is used)...Gordon ends up in the sewer with Bane...still has the speech on him.

Yeah I GUESS he could have left it there for days but it still feels problematic and weird..
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Maybe Gordon is so commited to justice that he never changes his clothes.



So committed is he to cleaning up Gotham but he neglects to clean himself. Stinky Gordon they call him.

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AWhy did no one ever believe Gordon that there was a 7 ft Golds Gym member cosplaying Darth Vader living in the sewer with an army of mercs and that that might be a bad thing.

Until they DO believe it and send EVERY SINGLE COP in the city down there to get trapped..
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AGuys, 2012 called. They want their nitpicks back.
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ADon't even get me started on 2012. I hate Roland Emmerich movies.

TDKR > 2012
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These nits are new to me, Bradito. Not everyone gets to consume pop culture at such a brisk and sexually adept pace.

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I don't know why they don't believe every single report, when the last bad thing that happened was a guy dressed like a clown single-handedly taking the entire city hostage. And before that, some dudes poisoned the entire water supply and made half the city go crazy by vaporizing and weaponizing it.



When you're a cop in Gotham, you know what calls you should ignore? Fucking none of them.

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A[quote name="Fraid uh noman" url="/community/t/144220/the-dark-knight-rises-post-release-thread/5460#post_3930860"]Don't even get me started on 2012. I hate Roland Emmerich movies.

TDKR > 2012[/quote]

I meant the year 2012. Y'know, when this movie was released? Three years ago.
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AI thought that it was pretty obvious that I knew that but decided to respond by making a worse joke. I mean, why would you randomly bring up a Roland Emmerich movie?
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I got a hall pass, signed by Nooj. Says I'm good, cause I just watched it on TNT last night.

I missed the last thirty minutes or so though because SHOW ME A HERO was coming on HBO. I just wanted to get all you guys riled up, kick the swarm a bit, then urge you to watch SHOW ME A HERO so we can talk about how awesome that shit is, instead of how dumb TDKR is.

But for real, TDKR is super dumb. I'm actually looking forward to see how dumb it gets, now. But I'm gonna wait for it. Savor the anticipation. Like when that french dude was trying to bang Marge Simpson.



zee anteeceepazhun

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AYou guys think Mitt Romney has a chance against Obama? I mean, I guess it won't matter since the world's going to end on December 21st.

Also, how did Bruce get back to Gotham?
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This is great.



It's like we're all starving and we have spotted the delicious pie on the window. We know it will burn our tongues, we know we will be sick, but we will gorge on the pie.

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AWhy did the Joker give Batman the wrong address?

Also, Clinton vs. Giuliani for prez. Who wins?
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Alfred really is a colossal prick in this one, huh?

"You're totully gunna die Mista Wayne, and your dead-GF wasn't even that into you."

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AKatie Holmes isn't very good as Rachel!

Also, Bush really told Brownie he was doing a "heckuva job" on Katrina?! Shenanigans!
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Chris O'Donnell's career will be fine. Not so sure about Uma's tho.

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AMICHAEL KEATON HAS BEEN CAST AS BATMAN?!
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The power of this thread...



...is causing Brad to experience the sensation of ALL OF TIME as a singular moment!




Please watch the last 30 minutes, Zhu...

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ABradito is Dr Manhattan?
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AI am naked right now.
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I know.

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Quote:

Originally Posted by mcnooj82 View Post
 


Please watch the last 30 minutes, Zhu...




I think I'm gonna have to live-blog it.

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Quote:

Originally Posted by MichaelM View Post
 


a well oiled machine



I don't even have to do anything!

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What is it about Batman that causes everyone to TROLL?



Gordon steps in, "Escalation."

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AIf I deleted this thread, CHUD would collapse into a blackhole and we'd be deposited into a Xibalba-like underworld where nooj's avatar is a god-beast with forty-eight curdled milk spewing teats, forcing us to watch M:I-2 on an infinite loop.

That deep, eldritch fear is the only thing keeping me from doing it.
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