Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
CRAWL post-release
#36
(08-13-2019, 12:35 PM)noirheaven Wrote:  not surprising, given that she provided the last Pirates of the Caribbean film with some depth in a brutally underwritten and cliched role. She truly shines here, however.

oh, that was her!!!

I had no idea!
Reply
#37
Is that Pirates film worth seeing ... *sigh* ... I don't really want to.

Reply
#38
(08-13-2019, 04:22 PM)Overlord Wrote: Is that Pirates film worth seeing ... *sigh* ... I don't really want to.

How big a fan of the POTC franchise are you? What's your tolerance level for Depp leaning hard into Jack Sparrow's drunken shenanigans? Scodelario is one of the highlights, along with Rush. Bardem underplays things in an interesting way as the villain. Thwaites is dead weight as the lead.

Overall, I think it's significantly better than ON STRANGER TIDES, still not as good as Verbinski's trilogy. But I'm weird and enjoy all the movies, so my taste is subject to question!
If we can dream it, then we can do it.
Reply
#39
nah, don't bother
Reply
#40
I didn’t hate it. Still have some affection for pirate related stuff. It did pirate stuff throughout. Kaya Scoliosis is memorably good in it.

But it’s about as inessential a film as you’ll ever (not) see. If you haven’t watched it yet, then you don’t want to watch it, and you shouldn’t.
Brigadier Cousins on PSN
Reply
#41
(08-13-2019, 04:25 PM)Belloq87 Wrote:
(08-13-2019, 04:22 PM)Overlord Wrote: Is that Pirates film worth seeing ... *sigh* ... I don't really want to.

How big a fan of the POTC franchise are you?  What's your tolerance level for Depp leaning hard into Jack Sparrow's drunken shenanigans?  Scodelario is one of the highlights, along with Rush.  Bardem underplays things in an interesting way as the villain.  Thwaites is dead weight as the lead.

Overall, I think it's significantly better than ON STRANGER TIDES, still not as good as Verbinski's trilogy.  But I'm weird and enjoy all the movies, so my taste is subject to question!

I am a tremendous fan of the first POTC.  None of the sequels have managed to even come close, IMHO.

(08-13-2019, 04:26 PM)Nooj Wrote: nah, don't bother

Yay!  Saved me 2.4 hours!

(08-13-2019, 04:29 PM)arjen rudd Wrote: I didn’t hate it. Still have some affection for pirate related stuff. It did pirate stuff throughout. Kaya Scoliosis is memorably good in it.

But it’s about as inessential a film as you’ll ever (not) see. If you haven’t watched it yet, then you don’t want to watch it, and you shouldn’t.

I do like Kaya Synesthesia, though ...

Reply
#42
(08-13-2019, 01:13 PM)turingmachine75 Wrote: Looks up 'pulchritudinous'.

Hey now, I have done a good deed, I guess? 

(08-13-2019, 02:53 PM)Overlord Wrote:
(08-13-2019, 01:13 PM)turingmachine75 Wrote: Looks up 'pulchritudinous'.

IIRC it means the opposite of what you'd think from the sound.  Basically, an ugly way of saying "super gorgeous."

**Kaya is married to the empath from Jessica Jones season 3, and she's a mommy!

Ugly way?! Aw. Kaya is married and a mother? No more five-dollar words describing her!

(08-13-2019, 04:02 PM)Nooj Wrote:
(08-13-2019, 12:35 PM)noirheaven Wrote:  not surprising, given that she provided the last Pirates of the Caribbean film with some depth in a brutally underwritten and cliched role. She truly shines here, however.

oh, that was her!!!

I had no idea!

I didn't, either, until I IMDB'd her after seeing Crawl, ha.

(08-13-2019, 04:22 PM)Overlord Wrote: Is that Pirates film worth seeing ... *sigh* ... I don't really want to.

It depends...

(08-13-2019, 04:25 PM)Belloq87 Wrote:
(08-13-2019, 04:22 PM)Overlord Wrote: Is that Pirates film worth seeing ... *sigh* ... I don't really want to.

How big a fan of the POTC franchise are you?  What's your tolerance level for Depp leaning hard into Jack Sparrow's drunken shenanigans?  Scodelario is one of the highlights, along with Rush.  Bardem underplays things in an interesting way as the villain.  Thwaites is dead weight as the lead.

Overall, I think it's significantly better than ON STRANGER TIDES, still not as good as Verbinski's trilogy.  But I'm weird and enjoy all the movies, so my taste is subject to question!

Pretty much everything Belloq just said.

I went into the local multiplex one midsummer day 2017 and decided that I'd dirty myself by attempting to brave a double feature of PIRATES 2017 as I shall call it, seeing as I couldn't name its title now with literally zero sleep and considerable indifference to save my life without IMDB'ing it again, along with the Tom Cruise-starring THE MUMMY. It's that kind of movie. It's insubstantial. You go in looking at it like it's a summertime afternoon-killer and you will probably find yourself giving it a pass. There is a delirious sequence involving a guillotine, and Belloq's point regarding Javier Bardem's lovably-understated villain (right when I was groaning about the prospects of him playing Yet.Another.Villain. going into it as an abstract concept) merits reiteration. And Geoffrey Rush. Thwaites is Ligh-Thwaites, he's more insubstantial than the movie even deserved and it was aiming to be insubstantial aside from one relationship whose characters I shall not spoil.

I have somewhat peculiar tastes when it comes to the Pirates franchise, though. The first movie's a wonderful Raiders of the Lost Ark-lite for the early-20th century, real lightning-in-a-bottle thanks chiefly to Johnny Depp's delicious comic performance wedded to the rest of the enterprise. The first sequel in 2006 was too consciously Empire Strikes Back, but The Bloated, Boring Version, and the third movie practically put me to sleep. And I say this as someone who likes Gore Verbinski but he definitely sometimes does not know when to rein himself in, traits he's displayed throughout his entire career to date. 

On Stranger Tides back in 2011 was a movie that I was willing to give a pass to as summertime fluff, and even though it's grievously flawed, I kind of enjoyed it mildly as a late-afternoon time-killer with a few inspired moments amid a whole bunch of mediocre-or-worse ones (which I know means it failed the purported Howard Hawks rule of appraising films). 

(08-13-2019, 04:26 PM)Nooj Wrote: nah, don't bother

Hey! Or perhaps I should say, "ARGH!" even if it's too on-the-nose. Oh, well, I did it, anyway.
Reply
#43
it's not worth hating

I saw it in IMAX 3D and forgot it existed until it was brought up in regards to Kaya's part in it

she was indeed good! but you still have a bunch of forgettable movie all around it
Reply
#44
What's funny is Johnny Depp is, being involved in one or two action set-pieces aside, the least of the last Pirates movie's worthwhile attributes. Well, except for Ligh-Thwaites. Nooj is utterly correct about Thwaites, who's just so weak in his role. But it's a curious beast, as Kaya Synonymous, Javier Bardem and Geoffrey Rush all bring the goods. Treat it like a buffet and take what looks good. Or pulchritudinous.
Reply
#45
Contextually, I took it to mean striking. Or possibly insect-leggy?
Reply
#46
The setpieces in DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES are indeed kind of fun. Certainly more entertaining than the fairly inert action of ON STRANGER TIDES.

Overlord, if you like Scodelario and have even some affection for the series, it could be worth a watch for you.
If we can dream it, then we can do it.
Reply
#47
Just popping to correct Overlord that DEAD MAN'S CHEST is better than CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL.
"Nooj's true feelings on any given subject are unknown and unknowable. He is the butterfly flapping its wings in Peking. He is chaos and destruction and you shall never see his true form." - Merriweather

My Steam ID: yizashigreyspear
Reply
#48
The action is certainly better. Ultimately it's let down by AT WORLD'S END not doing its part and paying-off DMC's threads in a satisfying way.

CURSE works better as its own contained thing.
If we can dream it, then we can do it.
Reply
#49
Agreed on both parts. And I'm actually OK ignoring everything after DMC, writing it/imagining it in my head as I think it should have gone. DMC has such a fucking great ending....and then what we got after was such a letdown.
"Nooj's true feelings on any given subject are unknown and unknowable. He is the butterfly flapping its wings in Peking. He is chaos and destruction and you shall never see his true form." - Merriweather

My Steam ID: yizashigreyspear
Reply
#50
Think there's any hope for Depp from now on?
Reply
#51
(08-13-2019, 06:12 PM)MichaelM Wrote: Just popping to correct Overlord that DEAD MAN'S CHEST is better than CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL.

Can you hear my sneer?

Reply
#52
I AM IMMUNE
"Nooj's true feelings on any given subject are unknown and unknowable. He is the butterfly flapping its wings in Peking. He is chaos and destruction and you shall never see his true form." - Merriweather

My Steam ID: yizashigreyspear
Reply
#53
DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES is THE FORCE AWAKENS of its franchise.  A satisfying, remix sequel that gets zero points for originality but nevertheless gets the job done and picks up the spare after the tired ON STRANGER TIDES.  It is probably the most dignified fifth installment that the series could realistically hope given that it somehow shambled to a fifth installment.  It is kind of a miracle that they were able to end the series on such a halfway decent note, so rest assured that they will fuck it up and keep going.
Reply
#54
Yeah, fatherdude is right.

We'll be seeing Timothee Chalamet playing the rebooted Jack Sparrow for Disney real soon in all likelihood.

But yes, Dead Men Tell No Tales (oh yeah that's what it's called) was a satisfying conclusion to the whole film series.
Reply


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)