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JURASSIC WORLD 3: A PRE-RELEASE THREAD BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE BOOK OF HENRY
#1
Sam Neill, Laura Dern, and Jeff Goldblum are all returning in Colin Trevorrow's Jurassic World 3.

https://twitter.com/Collider/status/1176722832501477376

So which one gets slaughtered mercilessly by Dinos because it's surprising and subversive?
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#2
Who gives a fuck?

Seriously tho. After the last one somehow made Lost World even WORSE?

Who cares?
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#3
Well excuse Ariana Richards all the way to hell.
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#4
remember when this guy was gonna make a star war?
"There's only one question to resolve. I'm scared. I feel a little crazy. I'm not lucid. The assumptions are right. I can feel my fear growing. Now is the time for the answer. Just one question. One question to answer.

WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?
[i]WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?
WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?
WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?
WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?






[/i]


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#5
How do you make Lost World again BUT DO IT WORSE?!

It's considered lesser Spielberg! Lesser beard just fucking around is still Shakespeare compared to mere mortals.
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#6
Bring back Vince Vaughn
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#7
The only possible sequel I could have seen working was basically going the GREMLINS 2 route of just going NUTS with everything, and that really should have been JURASSIC WORLD, and all we got was the Margarita Guy.
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#8
Didn't see the second one and I'm most definitely passing on this one too. Just let it die.
Originally Posted by ImmortanNick 

Saw Batman v Superman.
Now I know what it's like to see Nickelback in concert.

That's my review.
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#9
I'm down. Neil and Goldblum and Dern back? Yes please! Feeeeed my nostalgia! But whatever. JP3 is the only one of these that I haven't liked so....bring it. Yes yes yes....the original is the only one that is hard sci-fi. And it's the best. But still. This is good enough for me..
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#10
"Feed my nostalgia" is why we're in this mess to begin with.
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#11
So I'm the only one who liked Fallen Kingdom?

Love that the main three are returning.
"Nooj's true feelings on any given subject are unknown and unknowable. He is the butterfly flapping its wings in Peking. He is chaos and destruction and you shall never see his true form." - Merriweather

My Steam ID: yizashigreyspear
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#12
Some mess.

No you're not the only one who liked Fallen Kingdom..
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#13
No he is. He really really is.
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#14
(09-25-2019, 08:07 AM)freeman Wrote: No he is.  He really really is.

[Image: giphy.gif]
"Nooj's true feelings on any given subject are unknown and unknowable. He is the butterfly flapping its wings in Peking. He is chaos and destruction and you shall never see his true form." - Merriweather

My Steam ID: yizashigreyspear
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#15
Already looking forward to early 2022, when I'll be playing this on HBO in the background while I do stuff around the house.
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#16
It's an awful, useless, BAD film.

I hate it.
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#17
FALLEN KINGDOM is wonderfully bonkers. I'm bummed they're bringing back safe, bland Trevorwhatever for the next one.
"Nooj's true feelings on any given subject are unknown and unknowable. He is the butterfly flapping its wings in Peking. He is chaos and destruction and you shall never see his true form." - Merriweather

My Steam ID: yizashigreyspear
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#18
I like how the animal that is a hybrid of a raptor even though it was ALREADY a raptor hybrid can't decide if it wants to be a mindless dumb animal that literally bashes its own body through objects to get to its prey, or if it's a very careful sneaky intelligent Nosferatu creepy vampire creature that sneaks into a little girls room by delicately opening the door with its big dumb hands.

Fallen Kingdom is the kind of movie that would have their super predator act COMPLETELY differently within two minutes depending on the needs of the moment, and that sort of thing is not something I'm on board to have fun with unless the fundamentals are there. The movie was directed well and with style and flair. But it didn't save it from being pure hot garbage.
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#19
(09-25-2019, 08:05 AM)MichaelM Wrote: So I'm the only one who liked Fallen Kingdom?

Love that the main three are returning.

I like it more than I dislike it... but barely. The mansion stuff is very good; the stuff before that... not so much.

I'm also excited about Neill, Dern, and Goldblum being back together. Hopefully the story actually allows for them to interact, and they're not just a series of unconnected cameos.
If we can dream it, then we can do it.
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#20
I just wanted an entire movie about the Pachy ramming through people.

State fair? PACHY RAM!

Football game? PACHY RAM!

A President committing treason? PACHY RAM!

I cannot give a negative review to a movie with a dinosaur headbutting rich people into the sky.
Gamertag: Tweakee
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#21
I checked out of Fallen Kingdom when the Indoraptor (ungh) literally winked and smirked at the camera when playing dead while the trophy collector crept into its cage. I'm like, oh, so we're at straight-up self parody level of cheese now? Groan.
Git' in under mah belly!
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#22
I LOVED that section. The movie knew exactly what it was doing and leaned in fucking hard.
"Nooj's true feelings on any given subject are unknown and unknowable. He is the butterfly flapping its wings in Peking. He is chaos and destruction and you shall never see his true form." - Merriweather

My Steam ID: yizashigreyspear
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#23
Jurassic Park is a perfect film, but as a concept it's good for exactly one story, and we live in the 1 in 14,000,605 universes where that story was directed, written, cast, designed, and scored flawlessly on the first go. There's nothing else you can do with it that'll approach Spielberg's original film, and the 1993 film's existence harms the sequels because they literally cannot replicate the awe and wonder part of that first film. All you've left is dread and terror, TLW used them up, and since JP III it's been coasting on cartoony thrills and jumps.

Said cartoony jumps and thrills can be an enjoyable time at the cinema though, and I'm sure I'll enjoy JW3 when it comes out. But the *real* Dr Grant and Sattler never met quppy millennial bro throwback Owen Grady, imo - no, they flew away from Isla Nublar, got married, and lived happily ever after. I think the story of the first film works best if it ends there - it's a lot more melancholy.
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#24
I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with one intellectually satisfying movie and then monster movie sequels of roughly the same visual quality (which goes a long way with a great many folks) based in that world..
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#25
FALLEN KINGDOM (dumb title) was kinda enjoyable in a schlocky way, but that's all I can say of it. Nothing after THE LOST WORLD has tempted me to revisit further sequels after seeing them once in theaters.
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#26
(09-25-2019, 12:45 PM)fraid uh noman Wrote: I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with one intellectually satisfying movie and then monster movie sequels of roughly the same visual quality (which goes a long way with a great many folks) based in that world..

That's Godzilla right there, and what Jurassic Park has pretty much turned into.  Tolerate the human stuff, stay for the dino action.
Just this guy, you know?
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#27
(09-25-2019, 12:48 PM)mr. stockslivevan Wrote: FALLEN KINGDOM (dumb title) was kinda enjoyable in a schlocky way, but that's all I can say of it. Nothing after THE LOST WORLD has tempted me to revisit further sequels after seeing them once in theaters.

Yeah I enjoyed Fallen Kingdom fine. It didn't beat the first one but none of them have. Trained raptors joining forces with Pratt to take out super dinosaurs? Dumb fun to me.
“I call upon you to stop this musical now,” she said to the board. “You tear a community apart if you don’t.” -Prachi Ruina                                                            
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#28
I love how Clom did nothing to get this goodwill with the studio back except go away for a year or two. He must have a very persistent agent.

"My client is a billion grossing director! A billllllion!"
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#29
Too bad they never throw some love at prehistoric mammals. Platybeladon in the hizzouse! Giant sloths! Uhhh... tiny horses? Ok I get it now
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#30
A wooly mammoth wouldn't be entirely unwelcome I suppose. Whatcha bet it's gonna be the INDO-SPINO. *gags*
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#31
Indo Wooly!
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#32
We need a regular wooly before an indo wooly!
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#33
(09-25-2019, 02:40 PM)Munson Wrote: Too bad they never throw some love at prehistoric mammals. Platybeladon in the hizzouse! Giant sloths! Uhhh... tiny horses? Ok I get it now

This is what I was suggesting in the years prior to JW’s production that they should throw some prehistoric mammals/Cenozoic creatures into the mix like mammoths, saber tooth tigers, terror birds, giant sloths, etc. It’s not what Crichton intended in his original novels, but it offers some new scenarios.

The only issue is that I can see it devolving into a live-action version of the Ice Age franchise.
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#34
(09-25-2019, 02:43 PM)fraid uh noman Wrote: A wooly mammoth wouldn't be entirely unwelcome I suppose. Whatcha bet it's gonna be the INDO-SPINO. *gags*

I welcome the mammoth, weren't we actually close to actually cloning one of those a few years ago? And by us I mean scientists not me and you on a drunken night.
“I call upon you to stop this musical now,” she said to the board. “You tear a community apart if you don’t.” -Prachi Ruina                                                            
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#35
(09-25-2019, 12:32 PM)rexbanner Wrote: But the *real* Dr Grant and Sattler never met quppy millennial bro throwback Owen Grady, imo - no, they flew away from Isla Nublar, got married, and lived happily ever after. I think the story of the first film works best if it ends there - it's a lot more melancholy.

Nah, Sattler and Malcolm continued the torrid love affair that began on the island after leaving the park and her and Grant just drifted apart.
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