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Last Christmas Post Release
#1
Jesus CHRIST.

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#2
Is it spank worthy?
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#3
I'm assuming the very obvious thing is true?
I might have been born yesterday sir, but I stayed up all night!
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#4
I sat down to open this thread and post my thoughts and realized as I was about to start that I both hated too much stuff to count and didn't care about any of it at the same time so I just kind of gave up.

This is not worth the 42 percent on RT. After remembering I liked Bridesmaids and Spy I assumed some part of me hating Ghostbusters was not Paul Fieg's fault, but my own baggage as a fan that I simply couldn't get around. Nope. This was laughless, weird in a bad way at times, boring at times, SICKLY sweet when it's trying to be breezy and romantic, the banter is grossly overwritten, and the main character is perhaps one of the most unlikable protagonists I've seen in a film in years. Just when it seems like it might possibly be pulling itself together in the third act the twist hits and it's not even fun awful like Serenity, it's just hacky Hallmark channel bullshit.

Paul Fieg does not deserve to be directing major motion pictures. You made a movie with EMILIA CLARKE that I wanted to walk out of. HOW DO YOU FUCK UP THAT BADLY?!
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#5
Thanks for taking one for the team, freeman.
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#6
(11-08-2019, 09:29 AM)Felix Wrote: Thanks for taking one for the team, freeman.

I wouldn't suggest anyone bother with this. Romance fans won't get their fix, comedy fans won't get their fix. Fans of Thompson Clarke and Golding will all be more annoyed than anything. I was miserable and I wanted to leave.

With Midway being apparantly even WORSE than this I'd say Doctor Sleep is the winner if you've got to see something.
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#7
Freeman, please spoil the twist!
If we can dream it, then we can do it.
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#8
You can already tell what the twist is from the trailer and the name of the film. That's how obvious it is.
I might have been born yesterday sir, but I stayed up all night!
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#9
I want confirmation that it's that stupid!
If we can dream it, then we can do it.
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#10
(11-08-2019, 11:58 AM)Evi Wrote: You can already tell what the twist is from the trailer and the name of the film. That's how obvious it is.
SPOILER OR WHATEVER:

It's hilarious that the entire movie is apparently premised on the first two lines of that song.

END SPOILER OR WHATEVER
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#11
I just like imaging Freeman sitting through a lame rom-com with his arms folded, seething.
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#12
So the twist is that this movie is like a Christmas version of Body Parts, right?

I prefer my Hallmark Christmas movies where the protagonist has to save the town/factory/orphanage/soup kitchen before the Christmas Eve, usually aided by a character that overtly resembles Santa Claus and usually has the names "Nick" or "Chris".

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#13
SPOIL US!

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"Nooj's true feelings on any given subject are unknown and unknowable. He is the butterfly flapping its wings in Peking. He is chaos and destruction and you shall never see his true form." - Merriweather

My Steam ID: yizashigreyspear
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#14
So it's like the original ending to Terminator: Salvation?
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#15
Ends with Golding being severely disfigured in a helicopter accident. Goes to live in seclusion with a pet wolf.
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#16
When I was in China last year, I turned on Cinemax in my hotel room and found a dinosaur movie was on. The girl in it looked kind of like Emilia Clark. Then I realized it was Emilia Clark. Then I realized it wasn't a very good movie. Anyway, Freeman should probably see it.
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#17
Photo 
(11-08-2019, 02:32 PM)Alt-molt Wrote: Ends with Golding being severely disfigured in a helicopter accident. Goes to live in seclusion with a pet wolf.

[Image: SSC11119_o.jpg]

 


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#18
(11-08-2019, 05:32 AM)r. stockslivevan Wrote: Is it spank worthy?

Asking the real question.




(11-08-2019, 02:43 PM)bradito Wrote: When I was in China last year ....

[Image: wNVvkwK.jpg]

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#19
You don't travel for your job as Emperor??
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#20
(11-08-2019, 04:08 PM)bradito Wrote: You don't travel for your job as Emperor??

China is here, Mr. Burton.

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#21
What does that mean, huh? China is here? I don't know what the hell that means.
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#22
(11-08-2019, 04:31 PM)bradito Wrote: What does that mean, huh? China is here? I don't know what the hell that means.

[Image: 3fqewp.jpg]

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#23
And your phone is dead!
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#24
You two really shook the pillars of heaven.

Now: someone really spoil the damn movie for us, please!
"Nooj's true feelings on any given subject are unknown and unknowable. He is the butterfly flapping its wings in Peking. He is chaos and destruction and you shall never see his true form." - Merriweather

My Steam ID: yizashigreyspear
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#25
Oh, heck. Is the dude a ghost? Did she receive his heart??
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#26
Since Freeman appears to be ignoring us:

https://slate.com/culture/2019/11/last-c...ilers.html
"Nooj's true feelings on any given subject are unknown and unknowable. He is the butterfly flapping its wings in Peking. He is chaos and destruction and you shall never see his true form." - Merriweather

My Steam ID: yizashigreyspear
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#27
Ha! I'm a ducking genius.
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#28
(11-08-2019, 04:53 PM)MichaelM Wrote: Since Freeman appears to be ignoring us:

https://slate.com/culture/2019/11/last-c...ilers.html

What the fuck ...

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#29
I mean, that's not Book of Henry-level crazy, but it's, uh, certainly a thing.
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#30
HAHAHAAHAHAHA!!!

Better or worse than how Dany was treated in the final season of GOT?
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#31
I knew it! It really is that dumb!
If we can dream it, then we can do it.
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#32
Emilia Clarke begging to be cast in the Wheel of Time show as we speak.
Originally Posted by ImmortanNick 

Saw Batman v Superman.
Now I know what it's like to see Nickelback in concert.

That's my review.
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#33
The twist is that Emilia's character Kate needed a heart transplant and Henry Golding was the doner.  It's revealed in a literal verbatim Joker/Fight Club montage as the camera pans in on Emilia's face as she remembers every date she ever had with the Golding character where she was actually alone the entire time, talking to herself etc.  It's supposed to feel like romantic tragedy/Christmas miracle but it plays like Kate is a SEVERE schizophrenic just like Arthur.

II'm actually shocked how much I didn't enjoy this movie.  I was hoping for a breazy romantic rom com that didn't quite stick the landing.  Instead it's basically a miss all the way through.  What's supposed to be the heart and soul central relationship of the entire film is overwritten lame banter where Tom is endlessly encouraging Kate to "look up" all the time(Get it?).  The little one off lines and asides are the literal same type of non humor from Ghostbusters, and then there's just weird shit that went as far as to confuse me.

Michelle Yoeh's Santa character is the owner of the year round Christmas shop where Kate works and she has this weird as shit romance with a Slovakian man who comes into the shop and stares intensely at her and mumbles how he loves Christmas while odd music plays.  Then Yoeh's Santa stares back JUST as intensely. I assumed they were setting up some sordid shared history subplot because it was SO tonally odd, but then the man leaves, Kate says something like "that was like a strange Norwegian short film" and then the movie continues and I realized that was supposed to be the joke.

There's even a moment where Emilia's character realizes with genuine shock and surprise that Yoeh's legal birth name is not in fact Santa.  Brothers there is bad movies.  There's fun bad movies.  There's lame bad movies.

This was just bad bad.
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#34
This is kind of a rip-off of the Bob Hoskins/Denzel Washington movie, "Heart Condition."
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#35
It's the Sixth Sense/Return To Me crossover you never knew you wanted!
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