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Speak ONLY in movie quotes.
"You've got to hold the football like you would hold your lover. Gently, yet firmly. You wanna be both nurturing and clinging at the same time. Oh, yes. Just like making sweet love to the football. Be naughty with the football. Mmmm, spank it. Ever so gently. Spank it. Oh, uh, sorry, children"
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"It is the height of six American football fields, or five Canadian football fields. As if Canadian football really counts."
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"Like maple syrup, Canada's evil oozes over the United States"
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"It's a "Jump to Conclusions Mat"! You see, you have this mat, with different CONCLUSIONS written on it that you could JUMP TO!"
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"Do you know why the number 200 is so vitally important to the both of us? It's your weight and my IQ, now think, people!"
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"I look like I just jacked off an elephant!"
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The Almighty says, don't change the subject, just answer the fooking question.
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"Excuse me. Why does God need a starship?"
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"Don't cry upon God, Dr. Vesalius. He is on my side! He led me, showed me the way in my quest for vengeance."
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"Revenge is a dangerous motive"

"But a powerful one..."
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"It's the nukes. I know you love having the power of god at your fingertips."
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"Our little friend the atom. It can power a city...or level it!"
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"Life, which you so nobly serve, comes from destruction, disorder, and chaos."
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"The tragedy of your times, my young friends, is that you may get exactly what you want"
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"My ally is the Force. And a powerful ally it is. It surrounds us, binds us, penetrates us..."
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"Fuck you!"
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I'm sorry about the balls! It was a luck shot, that's all!
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If I make this next shot, you'll have to stop calling me Squeak.
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"Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet, you are a plague, and we are the cure."
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"This is how we fix things on the Russian Space Station!"
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"I'm gonna put a bullet hole in your fuckin' forehead, and I'm gonna fuck the brain hole!"
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"A Russian! I love Russians! Comrade, I've been fascinated by your five-year plan for the last fifteen years."
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"Hey, Carmine, let me ask you something. What sets off the metal detectors first? The lead in your ass or the shit in your brain?"
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"There's a war out there, old friend. A world war. And it's not about who's got the most bullets. It's about who controls the information. What we see and hear, how we work, what we think... it's all about the information!"
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"Do not speak to me of rules. This is war! This is not a game of cricket!"
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"Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules."
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They can't push the button if you disable the hand.
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"Am I to understand that you have inserted your father's skull in that ball for bowling?"
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"A girl's gotta have her standards."
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"One day, back in 1896, I was crossing over to Jersey on the ferry, and as we pulled out, there was another ferry pulling in, and on it there was a girl waiting to get off. A white dress she had on. She was carrying a white parasol. I only saw her for one second. She didn't see me at all, but I'll bet a month hasn't gone by since that I haven't thought of that girl."

P.S. Love this thread!

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"Bet you didn't count on my loyal army of prostitutes!"
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'I got a weird thing for girls who say "aboot."'
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Are you a lesbian? Leslie says that nine out of ten prostitutes are lesbians.
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It was then I learned my first lesson in radio broadcasting: lesbians get ratings.
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No, I'm serious. This is a serious exercise. It's like an SAT question. Which one is going to get to the hundred dollar bill first? The male-friendly lesbian, the man-hating dyke, Santa Claus, or the Easter bunny?
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