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Weird Dreams
took a brief nap just now. it was awesome.

our plane landed in sunny England, or what I made up to be England. We took the Harry Potter bus to the backside of the Parliament buildings...and the four of us exited.

The four being The Beatles. Except John wasn't with us, he was replaced with Bill Paxton in his Club Dread character. We were hustled towards a stage high above some square/plaza area.

Everything looked abandoned, nobody in the streets, but a disembodied voice kept yelling for us to get on stage now. We do.

Bill takes the lead and the three of them do an acapella version of his "welcome" song. I look down and now notice people sitting on, laying on, blue mats everywhere below us. I walk back down the stairs to see what exactly's going on. To my horror they're all zombies. Rotting, psychotic, killer zombies doing yoga. They have their legs crossed behind their necks, and for some reason a couple of them are soiling themselves.

The music stops. The Beatles spell stops. In this field of yoga zombies, I seem to be their next victim. So I run.

I run and I run until I notice I'm not really being chased. I turn around and see that most of the yoga zombies can't even outrun a golf cart car. And I'm now hypnotized as these crab like freaks hop and hop to get to me.

Then out of nowhere I am knocked over, I peer up and see furry feet running towards the yoga zombies. One is light gray, the other fully brown. Wtf. Zalbar and his dad have come to save me. They decimete the yoga zombies, but then turn to me and roar.

I run into a pickup truck, turn on the radio and guantanamera plays, and everything fades to white as I wake up.

(so yeah, who wants to buy the rights to this mind fuck of a dream)
I once dreamed I was banging Halle Berry.
two of my oddest dreams!!:

1: Im a Feldwebel in a German Penal Regiment in WW2 France (like the sven hassel books) We get to this village and then some SS types turn up and order us to execute all the villagers, I refuse and it ends up in a big gunfight between my men and the SS, we finally win and i personally shoot the SS leader in the head wiv my Pistol, then we are on the run with the saved villagers then i woke up!

2: Im on an archeological dig in South America, suddenly theres this huge awful sound from the trees, and thousands of screaming Zombies come Running out me and the other Dig people immediatly jump into our Biplanes! (wtf?) and take off, as we are flying just above the treetops, the zombies come running up the trees! and try to jump into the plane, we eventually get to civilisation and land and then the zombies come charging into the town and they are specifically after ME! I run into this Bar and Whoopie Goldberg is running it! She says quick sugar I got somewhere for you to hide, and takes me through this trapdoor into a secret Attic, in it are 2 Hippies playing Playstation and drinking beer, so i join in, then a while later Whoopie comes back in and says, Hey, Ive found a way to stop the zombies from coming for you, so I start grinning all releived and she pulls out a huge Pistol and Shoots me in the Head!!! I immediatly wake up and come flying out of my bed headfirst into the Wardrobe, I had a sore head for days!!!! And I can assure you, no Drugs were involved!!!
Possibly the most disturbing dream I've ever had: I dreamt we had a pet human. It was a fully grown man, but with the intelligence of a dog, and you could pet him. He started talking, which we perceived as a remarkable thing, and at the same time felt disturbed by. I don't know why, but just thinking about this dream is creeping me out.

Last night I had a dream that I'd started wearing women's clothing. To be fair, Dream Me looked pretty swish in a dress, but I have no idea what this dream might mean. Is this something to do with my lifelong dream to become a Ghostbuster?


Thanks for finding this thread, last night I had the most disturbing dream I've ever had.

I was having a few drinks with some former buddies of mine. At some point I needed to go to the bathroom. Couldn't find one, so in desperation I put my hand in my pants and crapped on it. While I was standing in the bar, with a handful of crap hidden in my pants, Bull Mentula (a famous Finnish bodybuilder) and his buddy came in. Here's a pic (about Mentula, not me with shit in my hand)

His buddy started to tell me about his killer idea for a horror film, which would make us all millionaires. He explained how it would have beautiful blue dresses and the title would be "IN FREEZE". I said I've seen it, it's actually a Disney animation. Then mr. Bull started to sing "Let It Go". I sang along, crying, with crap on my hidden hand.

Now, what does this mean?

AIt means you're crazy, dude,

But...I've no room to talk. I had a rather strange, disturbing (and disgusting) dream once involving a couple of walruses and some construction equipment..
AI used to have seriously weird dreams as a kid, but they've tapered off in later years. I kinda miss 'em. I'm not sure what the absolute freakiest dream I ever had was, but I can think of a few candidates:
  • I used to have a recurring nightmare as a child about some kind of huge demonic caterpillar thing - like a wooly-bear, but absolutely black and lke two feet long. I had the top bunk in our bedroom, and it lived in one of the drawers in the bottom. I don't remember the things it said, but it would try to get me to give my soul over to evil. Fortunately, it never made a very persuasive case, but it was pretty fucking scary to an eight-year-old.
  • On a weirdly similar note, I had another recurring dream in which Emperor Palpatine and Darth Vader were out on the front-porch roof, looking in my bedroom window. (Same bedroom - this was also the house in which my subconscious became absolutely convinced that there was a Velociraptor in my creaky old walk-in closet, since I could never prove to its satisfaction that there wasn't. And, despite me being a giant dinosaur nerd, my subconscious thought Velociraptors were the things from Jurassic Park, even though I already knew those were much closer to Deinonychus.) They were trying to get me to attempt some impossible task in order to prevent them from stealing my little brother's soul. Eerily enough, he went on to be the sibling who is the most into Star Wars.
  • One last one from that house: I once had a dream in which I watched myself get gored by a moose in the third person, in slow motion, on a foggy moonlit night. I'm not sure who my brain got as the cinematographer, but it was very evocative. There was something after that about a circus bear that I can't remember, then I woke up having trouble breathing due to a cold or possibly a sinus infection.
  • A few years later, in a different house, I dreamt that the people from my church were part of an evil cult.* They were gathered in the vacant lot across the road to sacrifice one of our calves. I could hear the mother bellowing in terror. It was another goddamn foggy night.
    * (Spoiler: they weren't.**)
    ** (Spoiler: as far as I know.)

Last night I had probably my first dream with an appearance by a fellow chewer. I was browsing the boards with my cell phone when I noticed that mr Bucho himself had PM'd me. The message read that Bucho had just escorted his four small children to the airport and they were coming to visit me. I realised that the message was from yesterday and that four Bucho jr's were wandering the Helsinki-Vantaa airport, lost and unattended. I rushed to my car and drove off. So intense was my race against time that I woke up. Hope your kids are allright, mr New Zealand.

AIt's already the future where Bucho is, so you know he's alright..

If your dream had timestamps, you wouldn't have been late.

ADefinitely got a strong feeling of who to cross off my list of potential Chewer godfathers to my future dreamchildren.

And here was me thinking the Finns were a dependable bunch.
ALast night I had a dream where I was playing the lead in sir Ridley Scott's upcoming prestige picture, based on the life of an African civil rights activist. We were shooting a long scene where I walk all the way through a city street. During the take few things popped to my mind:

- How come no one notices I'm wearing my own, not very historical looking glasses?
- How come no one notices I have a small limp in my left foot when I walk?
- Why the hell is my mom standing next to sir Ridley?
- How come no one notices I'm not black? (Though my co-star Angela Bassett seemed to have some doubts)

The meaning: maybe sir Ridleyshould consider retirement?
AI watched that new Star Wars trailer before I went to bed, and had a dream where I went to see the movie.

My dream version featured a scene where Yoda was eating in an American-style diner in space - and by that I mean the seats and tables were literally sat there out in space, no walls - and he's suddenly murdered in a drive-by shooting by another Yoda in an open-top space Cadilac.

Okay, I chuckled at that. But, seriously, stop smoking drugs, Paul.

ASmoking? Nah. But a glass of warm milk and a quart of peyote before bedtime always has me sleeping like a baby...
AI had a terrifying dream last night of a movie that doesn't exist....or something. It sure felt like it was real. It like I was half watching it/half in it. It had some of the Cameron regulars. But I remember Henrickson and Biehn the most clearly. It felt like a cross between Southern Comfort and....I don't know, a sequel to The Deer Hunter and maybe my own personal experiences in the military? But where Michael Biehn is playing DeNiro's role. And it's like it was made in 1980-'82 or so? And Biehn is working at some sort of park ranger facility/mountain rescue station with a few of his Army buddies. And then he has a 'Nam flashback and starts blindly murdering off his friends. So it was like he was a cross between DeNiro's character in Deer Hunter and Coffy in The Abyss. I don't know. But this was fucked up. I woke up like they do in a movie like sitting up breathing hard and disoriented and sweating..
Had a really trippy dream last night. It followed the cliche machine vs man sci-fi distopia trope pretty closely. It took place in the future and I was a part of a large battle taking place in Los Angeles against human created robots. Anyway for most of the dream I was trying to start up an old disconnected guided missile system, one they told me couldn’t be taken control of by an AI because the equipment was simply too old for the enemy AI’s to interface with online.

Anyway in this dream everyone was telling me that this would activate small guided missile strikes on the machine forces. Near the end of the dream I finally get it running, enter the targets and then launch the missiles. I then leave the city. While fleeing a huge shockwave knocks my escape vehicle into a lake. What seemed like hours later I wake up on the lake’s shore, groggily turn to look back at the city and realize those small guided missiles were actually nuclear warheads and almost nothing remains of Los Angeles. I also find out that because of this most of humans outside of the blast radii had surrendered, thinking the machines had done it.

After waking up I still can’t figure out if the people in my dream who were telling me to activate this missile system knew they were nuclear missiles and lied to me, or if they’re info was just incorrect, or if it was an AI that was posing as a person who told me how to get the system online.

Overall the dream felt like the dark middle chapter of a trilogy. One that I’d kind of like to watch.
When life gives you lemons, lemonade is little consolation. 
Had a dream where I was at a film festival. The big surprise screening was the world premiere of a lost late-70's/early-80's horror film where Louie Anderson stares at people from their windows. He never kills anyone but everyone in attendance (including myself) is creeped the fuck out.

The real ending to Big...
I had a really creepy dream last night. Hard to describe, but it involved a large haunted cliff side hotel (or mansion, seemed to switch between the two). The main thing I remember about it is that the building stood abandoned for some time and then a new owner came in and spruced it up and opened it. This owner made a big deal about it being haunted as a marketing ploy, so the first day it was open to the public everyone who showed up knew it was haunted and was skeptical and/or excited to see something supernatural.

So I remember being in the hotel’s lobby, full of people bustling around, complete with families, ghost hunting enthusiasts and even old men sitting in the lobby chairs reading newspapers. I remember telling the owner I didn’t think this was a good idea and then saying I was leaving. I walked into the back room of the lobby to get my jacket and halfway into doing this all of the background chatter stopped and everything became dead silent.

I turned around and looked back into the lobby behind me and it was completely empty. Everyone had just vanished and the air felt stale and dead. I immediately ran like hell out of the building and told the police. They went to check th hotel the next day and they couldn’t find anyone. All the people were missing without a trace. Then a few days later an investigation turned up... something...

The newspapers the old men were reading in the lobby that they had left behind had a large obituary section, way larger than the obituary section of those papers should have been. In it was listed obituaries for every single one of the missing people.
When life gives you lemons, lemonade is little consolation. 

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